Marriage Tips: Lifelong Commitment


In March 2014, actress Gwyneth Paltrow and musician Chris Martin (Coldplay frontman) announced their “conscious uncoupling” after 10 years of marriage.

“The belief structure is the all-or-nothing idea that when we marry, it’s for life. The idea of being married to one person for life is too much pressure for anyone,” says Paltrow’s mentor Dr Habib Sadeghi and Dr Sherry Sami on the concept of “Conscious Uncoupling”.

In this day and age, do you find yourself agreeing with these sentiments?

Couples who look upon marriage as something worthy of the greatest honor and respect tend to be the couples who will stick together over the long haul.

They affirm marriage as the cornerstone of the family and of human society as a whole, regarding it as an unbreakable commitment to love and service toward one another.

Couples who are committed to one another:

• Value mutual devotion
• Value loyalty
• Value fidelity

In practical terms, they are committed to one another. This isn’t to say that they’re starry-eyed or unrealistic. On the contrary, they are under no illusions about the difficulties that stand in their way. They admit that they are imperfect people living in an imperfect world, but at the same time they have made up their minds to see the ups and downs as all having their place in marriage.

Couples who last are inspired by a particular vision of marriage. It’s this vision that keeps them going through thick and thin! And the secret to a great and successful marriage? These couples see their journey together as a grand adventure.

There is an old saying that goes, “It is not a lack of love, but a lack of friendship that makes unhappy marriages”.

Couples who go the distance are usually adventurers of a similar spirit. They believe that lifelong, thriving marriage is possible. They expect the journey to include hardships, dangers, and rocky passages as well as mountaintop views and ocean vistas.

Because of this, they are not afraid to press on together, taking life as it comes and living each day to the full because the one they love is by their side.

Try This! Renew your marriage vows. If you were married in a religious setting, consider visiting the same house of worship and re-reading your marriage vows to each other. You might invite a few friends or family members to witness the occasion and hold an informal reception afterwards.

This article is published with permission from Focus on the Family Malaysia. For more information, please call +603-7954 7920, email focus@family.org.my or surf to www.family.org.my, follow Facebook [focusonthefamilymalaysia]and Twitter [familiesMY]. You can also write to Focus on the Family Malaysia, 6-2 Jalan Bersatu, 13/4, 46200 Petaling Jaya.

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